I have recently been inspired by Tibetan practices by the idea that one should dedicate what they like to others rather than trying to possess what they like. Non-possessive appreciation is a very good way to lessen attachment and not to cultivate bitterness at what we don’t have.
Why can I not simply appreciate that women enjoy wearing socks, or sometimes not wearing them at all? In other words, there are two steps to this process:
- The first is to acknowledge that I am going to be okay if I don’t “own” the things I enjoy looking at. In fact, there is not even a need for me to “sexualize” what I enjoy or admire.
- I can dedicate the things I like to others, rather than cultivating a grasping attitude of wanting to have it for myself.
- I can let go of the things I crave by fully giving them to others to enjoy.
The advantage of this approach is that it allows me to give away what I crave while acknowledging that I have a possessive and unhealthy relationship to it. It’s also allowing me to create a space of equanimity around what I crave the most.
boysocks318 