Once there was a boy named Benjamin Xu, and he was a bit of brat. At age 5, he had three sisters, all of them older than him, and he used to run around with heavy moccasins, crushing the girls’ paintings with his heavy feet. None of his three sisters understood where his ridiculous aggression came from, let alone why he insisted on wearing heavy apparel on his feet when he is at home.
Julia Xu, Benjamin’s oldest sister of 13, decided that she had enough of this one day. She approached Benjamin’s mother with an exasperated expression on her face, and asked, “How come Benjamin keeps stomping around and crushing all of our precious things? Shouldn’t he be walking around in his socks like the rest of us? Or is he too ‘man’ for that?
Ellen and Michelle, the other two sisters, nodded their heads in agreement, while rolling their eyes.
Benjamin’s mother decided to sit down and have a long talk with her mischievous son. She had a good plan, so before having this talk, she decided to buy some special secret item at a department store.
“Benjamin, let me level with you,” Benjamin’s mother said. “Your three sisters have, understandably, been upset because apparently you have been using those slippers we bought you to crush their creations. I have been wondering as well, what has gotten into you these days? Why do you keep trying to destroy their things?”
Benjamin groaned. “I thought that’s what boys are supposed to do to become men. I am the only boy in this family, and I don’t want to not be a man.”
Benjamin’s mother was puzzled. “Well, Benjamin, I am quite confused by your answer, because I thought that real men are gentle and nice to women, not violent and aggressive. In particular, you seem to have gotten into the habit of destroying anything your sisters have done. What gave you the impression you needed to do that? Just because you are the youngest in the family?”
Benjamin paused. He thought about all the movies he watched about men who ran around with guns and acted macho in front of the women they loved. “I dunno,” he said looking down at his feet. “I guess I thought women loved boys who were really tough.”
Benjamin’s mother still looked confused. When she continued, a slight gleam appeared in her eyes. “You hardly even know yourself. And I think there’s something I would like you to know. What you think is manly behavior does not impress your mother or your sisters at all. What impresses us is a boy who is a good brother to the girls in his life, whether they are his friends, strangers, classmates, or biological sisters. They appreciate a boy who is thoughtful, not seeking pleasure, self-disciplined and considerate. Did you know that?”
Benjamin’s face turned red. “I just want girls to like me, and I thought being tough would be the way. And I am worried they will reject me unless I am a tough guy. I guess I don’t understand myself.”
Benjamin’s mother looked at her son, with compassion in her eyes. “I think it’s time that you learned how to master yourself a little bit better. For example, you have always refused to walk in your socks at home, because you probably don’t think it’s manly looking to do so. Am I right?”
Benjamin nodded demurely
“That’s why I am here to change that.” Benjamin’s mother slowly drew out the contents in her bag: a pair of long white socks, and a CD by a Korean girl group called Sistar 19. “My assignment to you is to wear these socks and listen to Sistar 19 while you are doing your chores in your bedroom. Sistar 19, by the way, is a K-pop band that is popular for their songs about girl power. “
Benjamin still looked puzzled, but his mother continued.
“Girl power is not about making boys feel bad: it’s about celebrating girls. And I want you to learn to celebrate girls without using your body in any way to try to conquer them. Be nice to your sisters, and see them as your friends, even when they snap at you or sometimes have better things to do than play with you. That is, love them unconditionally with your brain. That will make you a stronger boy who can withstand rejection by girls, rather than wimping out and blaming everybody around you for your misery.”
Benjamin reluctantly took the CD and started to slip the long socks, which almost came up to his knees. He admitted that this made him feel like he was a girl and he trembled with giddiness.
Just as Benjamin started to put the slippers over the socks (as though covering up his embarrassment) his mother interceded. “Uh-uh. No, you cannot have the slippers at least for now. I want you to get used to simply walking around in your new socks. I have three other pairs for you for when these socks get dirty. Please don’t be afraid to get your socks dirty.” Benjamin’s mother swiftly took the slippers away from Benjamin.
**
For the next few weeks, Benjamin felt shy. He would shuffle in his stocking feet, but when he came out to dinner with his sisters and mom, he felt somehow out of place, and wanted to hide his white socked feet somewhere. Sometimes, he even felt that rush of giddiness, but his mother would correct him.
“Please learn to be a real man in the house: do not get so excited about wearing socks. Please treat it as a normal part of you, and how it shows you are close to your sisters. Do you see how Julie, Ellen and Michelle all wear white socks up to their knees?”
With this, the three girls showed off their dainty socked feet and giggled.
“I guess this is my way of showing that I am a girl?” Benjamin quipped.
“You cannot be a girl or a woman, Benjamin, but wearing socks can show your support for them. You are not the mean little boy who stomps his grubby mocassins on his sisters’ art. You are the soft young man who softly treads in his socks.”
In the later weeks, Benjamin started getting used to listening to Sistar 19. In the beginning, he thought this was music for girls only, but then he realized that the music relaxed him with its happy beats, and was even showing him how to be a good friend to girls. Songs like “Ma Boy” were teaching him that all girls and women need respect, someone who is a good communicator and listener, and someone who acknowledges the awesome powers of women without trying to compete with them. Benjamin started to relax, knowing he didn’t need to compete with his sisters for attention, and even admitted that he was often slow witted compared to them. But it was okay, because all God’s creatures have good qualities that they can exercise in every situation.
Most of all, Benjamin learned to stride confidently in his white socks. He realized that a real young man has the strength to resist thinking that socks are embarrassing or somehow “weak”, and to be confident in his own clothes. He even started to forget that the socks were even on his feet, and his sisters started to see it as normal for him to wear socks in the house, just like them,
After the second month, when Benjamin’s mother offered him to take the slippers back, Benjamin realized that they were no longer necessary. In fact, he was more interested in continuing to explore what it’s like to wear socks while admiring his sisters and learning to respect them. He realized that it’s more important to respect girls than it is to show off in front of them, and his sisters saw a great change in him.
Benjamin decided to throw the slippers in the garbage, much to his other and sisters’ delight. Since then, he has only worn socks around the house.
boysocks318 